Living in Tension

My church and I are going through Acts for a Wednesday night Bible study. The first four chapters of Acts give this incredible retelling of the earliest life of the church. God is at work, and he is healing people in the temple, tongues of fire are coming down, and the church is completely unified and are taking care of each others needs. God's mission is evident to everybody who comes into contact with it, and it is having a powerful effect on all those who it comes into contact with. I love those four chapters. God is at work. His church is being the church and are participating in what God is up to. But then comes chapter five. I could live in chapters 1-4. Tell me to be a witness. Tell me to heal the lame. Tell me to be empowered by the Holy Spirit. Tell me to be as one mind with those in my church. Don't tell me about Ananias and Sapphira. Don't tell me about the human struggles and the consequences that come with them. Don't tell me that there were those in the early church were selfish. Keep me in chapters 1-4. Don't tell me about God judging quickly these two just like Achan. There is this tension in this new community, a tension that exists today. A tension between holiness and grace. The tension is there when I read Jesus. Richard Buridge writes about the tension in his book Imitating Jesus. He writes that the ethics that Jesus taught were incredibly conservative and radical for that day. Jesus teaches us to love our enemies, pray for those who persecute us. He teaches us that divorce is unacceptable (except for marital infedelity). Yet at the same time, Jesus is the friend of sinners. When everyone else was going to condemn a woman caught in adultry, Jesus doesn't. When no one else would talk to the Samaritan Woman with five husbands at the well, Jesus does. He heals the blind, the lame, and sets the prisoner free. Jesus not only lived the tension, he is the tension. The question I asked my church last night, and the question that I am still wrestling is how do we live the tension?

Wrestling w/Knowledge

One of my favorite stories in the Bible occurs on the eve on which Jacob, who had run away from his past, was about to come face to face with his brother, the one who he cheated years earlier. Jacob, sitting alone on the banks of the Jabok, wrestles with a mysterious figure all night long. This mysterious man overcomes Jacob, but Jacob never lets go. At day break, the figure asks Jacob his name (which has all kinds of psychological implications when you read Jacob in context since the first time he was asked that question in scripture, he said he was someone else), and then changes Jacob's name to Israel, one who struggles and is ruled by God. It is a great picture of what it means to journey with God, what it means to struggle with a God who is interactive in his creation.

This past weekend I attended a Pastor's Conference at my seminary, Truett Seminary. The speaker was well-known Christian author and philosopher Dallas Willard. His books, especially Renovation of the Heart, have impacted my life and thought greatly, and so I was already looking forward to the conference before it starts. He argued at the conference that knowledge is more important and is the basis of faith (not surprising coming from a philosopher). That goes against much of what I have been taught. We are often taught to seperate knowledge and faith. Willard says that is where the church went wrong. Now, he does not use knowledge in a Fundamentalist sort of way, or legalistic sort of way. Rather, Willard defines knowledge as interactive relationship. In other words knowledge of God is an interactive relationship with God. It is not a statement of faith, or a leap of faith into the unknown. Rather, faith is rooted in the knowledge of an interactive relationship with an interactive God. In other words, we need to wrestle with God so that we can have an interactive relationship with God. That is what discipleship is all about. It is about interacting with the God who is interacting in the world so that we can get to know who God is and where God is in mission in the world. The scary part of this is maybe we will come away with a limp like Jacob.

Forgiving the Church

I've been doing a series on forgiveness to start out this year with my church. I've talked what forgiveness is, why we should forgive, praying for forgiveness and of course Christ's sacrifice to forgive. One thing I have not addressed, but am going to this Sunday is forgiveness within the context of a church community. I came across these powerful words penned by Henry Nouwen:

"When we have been wounded by the Church, our temptation is to reject it. But when we reject the Church it becomes very hard for us to keep in touch with the living Christ. When we say, "I love Jesus, but I hate the Church," we end up losing not only the Church but Jesus too.

The challenge is to forgive the Church. This challenge is especially great because the Church seldom asks us for forgiveness, at least not officially. But the Church as an often fallible human organization needs our forgiveness, while the Church as the living Christ among us continues to offer us forgiveness.

It is important to think about the Church not as "over there" but as a community of struggling, weak people of whom we are part and in whom we meet our Lord and Redeemer."

(The picture is Rembrant's depiction of the return of the Prodigal Son)

W's Humor

I do not know what you feel about our current President. I do not agree with everything he has done, but I find him hilarious (I do not know if that is something I want or need in a President, but it is endearing). In his last news conference he was asked what he was going to do now that his presidency is over. Bush replied, "I do not see myself in an Hawiaan shirt on a beach staring at an Ocean. Particularly since I stopped drinking!" I'm going to miss those one-liners! Maybe I can hang out with him in Waco.

2008 - The Year of Change

I know it is a little late to do a reflection on the past year since the New Year is now 10 days old. However, I think that it will take me much longer than 10 days to process, adjust, and learn from the year 2008, which Sarah and I have dubbed the year of change. 2008 was a year that I definitely will look back on as a watershed year as the events of this past year have shaped my life for years to come. This past year

• Sarah and I got married! A great change if I do say so myself. I love my wife, I loved our wedding, and I love that we get to wake up every day together and do life together.
• I'm going to be an uncle! My sister-in-law, Jenny, is pregnant with baby Anistan Cate Simmons! Seeing as how we will be the only family in Texas, I have a feeling that Sarah and will be close to our niece.
• My parents moved from Beaumont to Texas City. No longer when I go "home," do I go to my hometown. It's sad because the church that first gave me my shot in ministry I am no longer a part of, or have much connection there. I am very happy for my parents as they followed what they felt like God was telling them to do. However, a month after they moved, Hurricane Ike came through Texas City (Texas City is 12 miles from Galveston). The house was ok, but many people in their church and surrounding community suffered great damage.
  
• Sarah's parents moved to Albuquerque, New Mexico to co-pastor a Disciples of Christ church. They previously lived in Red Oak, which is only 40 minutes from where Sarah and I live now. This will be a big change in our relationship as we will go from seeing them once or twice a month and knowing they are close, to seeing them maybe 3-4 times a year, and them being 12 hours away.
  
• Sarah and I moved to Mertens, Tx as I accepted the pastor of FBC Mertens. I love our church. We had to pack up our house that we had just moved into in Waco and move out here during the middle of the semester. We went from being five minutes away from school to 40 minutes of backcountry farm road driving from school. The church is great, but has been an adjustment for us.
• Sarah has decided to take a leave of absence from graduate school. She is selling Premier Design jewlery this semester, so if you are interested in having a show, let me know!
  

This is just a small list of all the joys and stresses that was the year 2008. Like I said, a watershed year for Sarah and I. I am looking forward to learning all the lessons God is going to teach us through these changes. In the mean time, one of my New Years goals is to blog at least once a week, so be looking for more blogs from me in the future!

The Bible Speaks

The previous post is from my new joint blog with my Dad called, The Bible Speaks 2 Me. We are reading a chapter (or two) from the Bible each day, and either my Dad or I am commenting on it. We are also asking our churches and our blogging friends to make comments on the daily Bible study to learn from each how God is using the scripture to speak to us. After all, the Bible is a living, breathing book that we as Christians center our way of life around. I hope that you join us in this journey. I will be posting soon some reflections on 2008 and my hopes for 2009.

Genesis 8

Genesis eight continues the story of Noah and the great flood. After the forty days of rain, and the 150 days of flooding, God remembered Noah. I do not think that God ever forgot about him. How else would you explain Noah and all those animals being safe throughout the storm and flood? Verses 15 and 16 explain God's plan all along: recreation. He was going to recreated the world with those who were saved in Noah's ark. After Noah got out of the ark, his first response was worship. He built an altar and sacrificed some of the clean animals as an offering to God. That sacrifice pleased God, and God made a covenant that he would never curse the ground again. Remember in the fall of humanity, God did not curse humans, but rather the ground. Here, God is reversing the curse of the ground. And even though humans are still evil in their thoughts, God promises to not destroy life again.

Two words stand out in this passage. One is that God remembered Noah. God always remembers his faithful. The whole earth was destroyed, but God remembered Noah. There was nothing left, but God remembered Noah. God remembers you as well. Though it may not feel like it sometimes, God remembers you. The second word that stands out to me is God's grace. Even though we deserve death from birth, God gives us the grace to live, and ultimately the grace to live forever with God through Jesus Christ.

God, help us to live by your grace and the knowledge that you promised you would never forget us. Amen

Small Town Church At Its Best

Last night small town, small church shone brightly in Mertens, Tx. We had our annual Lessons and Carols, which is your basic Christmas Eve Candle Light Service. Before we started our Lessons and Carols, our children (which we have surprisingly a lot, something must be in the water) performed the "Nativity." The lights were turned down low, with only the stage lights on. There was a small inn to the side of the stage and a barn complete with a manger and Christmas Tree and four bails of hay. Our girl that played Mary appeared on stage and then the music came on: Faith Hill's "A Baby Changes Everything." That's right, Faith Hill. And our kids acted out the nativity as told through the wonderful voice of Faith Hill. It was great. We even had a real live baby Jesus (even though Jesus was a girl last night)! All the kids in their costumes came out: angels, shepherds, wise men, a star, donkeys, camels, and even a pig (poor girl might have a complex later and a pig in a Jewish barn?). It was great. The girl who was the star took the verse literally that the star shone right where Jesus was because Jesus on this night was her sister, and she did not trust our Mary to hold baby Jesus! In fact, she tried to take Jesus at one point, and her mom had to rush to the scene to stop her. After a brief meet and greet time, and rearranging of the furnature, we began our Lessons and Carols. It was beautiful and chaotic at the same time. There were kids all over the place, and parents trying to control them as we read scripture, listened to our chior, and sang Christmas songs in worship of the Christ child. One kid would start crying and then the others would point and say what's that, and then another would run to try and help the baby stop crying. It was crazy and fun and the way that church should be, a family atmosphere. I have a feeling that Jesus smiled at our church last night. When we passed the light from the Christ candle and each person and child helped light up the room with their own candle, it was beautiful. Afterwards we had a Christmas party complete with Santa Claus coming to visit all of our kids. Never has a chaotic celebration seemed so beautiful to me. I leave you with my Advent Reflection as I lit the Christ Candle last night:
We have hoped with the prophets, placed our faith in the promises of God, discovered the joy of new life, and experienced peace beyond human understanding. Now the wait is over. Christ is here and he lights up our dark world.

Clumsy Best Man Makes For A Wet Bride!

One of the funniest videos I've ever seen!

Heisman?

61-41

Up Next: Big XII Championship

American Way vs. The Jesus Way

I started a book last night called The Jesus Way by Eugene Peterson. He has come up with what he calls "spiritual theology" and he wrote in his introductory chapter what I have been struggling with lately:

"It didn't take long for some of our Christian brothers and sisters to develop consumer congregations. If we have a nation of consumers, obviously the quickest and most effective way to get them into our congregations is to identify what they want and offer it to them, satisfy their fantasies, promise them the moon, recast the gospel in consumer terms: entertainment, satisfaction, excitement, adventure, problem-solving, whatever. This is the language we Americans grow up on, the language we understand. We are the world's champion consumers, so why shouldn't we have state-of-the-art consumer churches?"

What do you think about his idea of consumer churches and is there any way to avoid it with our consumer-American lenses on?

Lunch Today

Today Sarah and I ate lunch with our good friend Geoff Price, and his friends from Uganda Godfrey and Joy. Geoff is involved in helping starting an orphanage in Uganda along with Godfrey and Joy. Godfrey and Joy are pastors, and they help run an organization for pastors and churches in Uganda called Arise Africa. Godfrey's heart is in the church. He overseas about 200 churches. What he does is either start churches or go to churches that are struggling and train leaders from within the church to do the work. His biggest concern is helping churches to help meet needs. I asked him what are the basic needs and problems that African churches deal with. He says it is mostly clothing people, feeding people, and mentoring young ministers so that they can take the leadership of the church. Godfrey and Joy's joy were contagious, as they explained how they live out the Gospel in Uganda. This has been a war-torn country, and yet the church has survived and even thrived in the midst of poverty, war, and a lack of theological education among its ministers. Godfrey even invited me to come and speak with the pastors to help them with their theological training. What I always leave impressed and blessed on my life anytime I talk with an African Christian is their reliance upon prayer. They have to rely on God to meet their needs. Godfrey and Joy have 8 children, and they could not pay for school this past year. So that had each one of their kids pray for the money for school, and to be grateful even if God did not provide, and God ended up meeting way beyond their need. Listening for God's voice and prayer are woven in the fabric of African Christians. I need them, and their example. Godfrey and I talked about how he listens for God's voice in every decision he makes, and the joy he sees in God's provision. Certainly the African Church are not without their problems, but we need them as examples of prayer and God's provision.

Table Gospel

Sarah and I bought a table a few weeks ago. We love it. It is a "grown-up" table as Sarah calls it. The dark wood goes nicely in our three bedroom house in Mertens, which we are incredibly grateful for. We had a table before. It was a Wal-Mart special that I bought when I moved to Waco. It worked, but it was small. The table we have now is big and has a leaf in it. We can comfortably sit eight people at the "grown-up" table. We bought it for ministry purposes. After all we are now at our first pastorate and we know that we will be entertaining people. We needed a nice table to entertain our guests and church members.
The question that I am constantly asking myself is am I too American for the Gospel? I've got nice stuff like our table. I like my stuff. I like our table, and we even used ministry as a justification for buying the table from Patriot furnature (they really do have the lowest prices in Texas!). In my trip to Africa, nobody had a table like mine. Yet over there I learned more about being a Christ follower than I ever have here. I can't wait to go back so that I can learn more. I need those Christ followers, so that I can learn to live out a more authentic following of the Jesus way here in Mertens. I don't know where tables fit in to Christ following, or if that is my American expression of faith. In the mean time, my friend Julie has an excellant post on victimization.

New Blogs Coming

As Sarah and I have tried to get settled in Mertens, blogging has been put on the back burner. I do have a topic that I am still thinking through and will be thinking through out loud in the next couple of weeks: am I too American to fully accept the Gospel, or to follow the way of the Gospel? It is a discussion that I've thought about through Greg Boyd's Myth of a Christian Nation and a class discussion about a week ago. In the mean time check out two posts that have been meaningful to me lately by Dr. Stroope and my good friend Jeff.

Last Night's Debate

I rarely talk about politics on this blog for several reasons: 1. A kingdom person is not focused on politics, but rather the mission of God in the world. 2. I can get so wrapped up in politics that it can dominate my time. I am going to vote, and I am making an informed decision about my vote. With that being said, I am declaring last night's winner of the debate: Joe the Plumber. So here's to you Joe, way to capture America's hearts, and the hearts (maybe the anecdotal heart that appeals to voters) of the candidates.

Slowing Down

Life is hopefully starting to slow down just a bit. Sarah and I have pretty much moved into the house in Mertens, and we love it up here so far. This time of change and transition not only getting married but also moving and becoming a pastor has caused a lot of stress and anxiety for both Sarah and I. I always used to look at stress and anxiety as bad things, but it really is not. For me, it has caused me to look to God even more, and made me long for those times of silence and praying the Psalms. As life slows down, and hopefully as Sarah and I get into a routine of somekind, we will be able to cherish the rhythm. I leave you with pictures of the new house.

Thinking Out Loud

I am not an economist. Most of the language of the bailout is foreign to me since I have not had an economics class since high school. I did study a little bit of economics with Dr. Mullins in my history classes at OBU, but only enough to confuse myself even more. But I have made one observation. Many people go into debt trying to make the allusion that they are higher socially (whether this is conscious or unconscious I don't know). Our national debt is now about to hit the $10 trillion mark. I can't even fathom that much money. We talk about America being the greatest nation in the world, and to be honest I would not live any other place. But I wonder if all our debts, both individually and as a nation, are now catching up with us. We are in desperate need of Jubilee!

On another note, Sarah and I are moving Friday to Mertens, Tx. Excitement, anxiety, nervousness, and joy are swirling within us right now. The people of Mertens have been so kind to us already, and now my good friend John Lassitter is going to join us out there as music minister. I have a feeling God is going to move there in us and through us.

I'm a Pastor!

I am now the pastor of FBC Mertens, Tx. To be honest, it is not the place where I would have expected God to place Sarah and I, but it is a great church. Mertens is a town with a blinking light and a Coke Machine (literally), but is an incredible community. I am looking forward to serving the people there as we navigate how to live out the Way of Jesus in Mertens, Tx! Pictures will be coming soon of the house.

Changes

Changes. That has been the theme for Sarah and I's life the past few months. It has been unbelievable to see how our lives have been changed, even before marriage. In the past few months Sarah graduated undergrad, I was ordained, I did an internship in Arlington, we rented a house together (though we did not live together), Sarah basically lived out of a suitcase this summer, Sarah started grad school, my parents moved, Sarah and I are going to be an Aunt and Uncle, Sarah and I are most likely going to move to Mertens, Tx, and we got married two weeks ago today! I'm looking forward to seeing how God is going to work through this time of changes. What I have noticed is that I have longed for the times of silence with God through this. With that in mind, I leave with with a few pictures from the wedding.

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Bonhoeffer

This is an excerpt from a letter of Dietrich Bonhoeffer:

Our church, which has been fighting in these years only for its self-preservation, as though that were an end in itself, is incapable of taking the word of reconciliation and redemption to mankind and the world. Our earlier words are therefore bound to lose their force and cease, and our being Christians today will be limited to two things; prayer and righteous action among men. All Christian thinking, speaking, and organizing must be born anew out of this prayer and action. By the time you have grown up, the church’s form will have changed greatly. We are not yet out of the melting-pot, and any attempt to help the church prematurely to a new expansion of its organization will merely delay its conversion and purification. It is not for us to prophesy the day (although the day will come) when men will once more be called so to utter the word of God that the world will be changed and renewed by it. It will be a new language, perhaps quite non-religious, but liberating and redeeming – as was Jesus’ language; it will shock people and yet overcome them by its power; it will be the language of a new righteousness and truth, proclaiming God’s peace with men and the coming of his kingdom. ‘They shall fear and tremble because of all the good and all the prosperity I provide for it’ (Jer. 33.9). Till then the Christian cause will be a silent and hidden affair, but there will be those who pray and do right and wait for God’s own time. May you be one of them, and may it be said of you one day, ‘The path of the righteous is like the light of dawn, which shines brighter and brighter till full day’ (Prov. 4.18). (p. 300)